After my mother died, I spent four months trying to figure out my life again. To deal with the tremendous life change, I closed up and did not. I distracted myself as much as I could and just kept moving. I did not want to feel because when I did it would overwhelm me and I ended up crying for days. So I went numb to life. I was exhausted, miserable, out of shape and became more and more depressed. I was increasingly getting terrible mind bending headaches and became more and more anxious from the visual of my mom during her last days. The more I tried to keep it together, the more that I fell apart. Worse, I could not get inspired to make the changes to take care of myself because I lost my passion for life. Without my mother’s love and support, I was withering inside and about to explode. Worse yet, my fear of death overtook me. I used to believe that nothing bad could happen because my mother was there to pray for me or I felt protected by her presence. Then, she was gone- Now what? It was August of 2011, I woke up out of sleep to a ringing in my head. I thought that is might be coming from somewhere in the room, but as I moved around- it followed me. It was the beginning of a terrible case of tinnitus that was caused by the overwhelming stress and anxiety that I had accumulated in my body over the past 6 months. If anyone had ever experience tinnitus, you will know how maddening this condition can be. It does not allow you to sleep, and over time insomnia creeps in. It does not allow you to rest, silence is a commodity that is longed for. It does not allow you peace, you are constantly worrying that something is wrong with you because how can this be normal. I was checked out by an ENT, MRIs, Ear Specialists and Cardiologist to find out if there was a clear physical problem that could be addressed. I was told that I would just have to get used to it and advised that anti-depressants or anti-anxieties could possibly assist. I was prescribed sleep aids to help me sleep.
But, my gut told me to stay away from the narcotics. They were not for me. I had to find another solution but had not idea what to do. I got more and more anxious over time thinking that I would have to live with the ringing for the rest of my life. Once again, I needed help and one of my best friends Karyn Todd came to my rescue. She called me and told me that she had met a wonderful woman who practiced either acupressure or acupuncture, she was not sure! What she was sure of was that I needed help and this might be just what the doctor ordered. A strange thing happens to your mind when you face anxiety and fear, you don’t trust anyone, and in my case I especially did not trust doctors. But, having gotten very little sleep and no peace, I gratefully met Karyn and she drove me to see Eva. I had no idea what to expect. I was picturing someone Chinese, but the doctor that I talked to on the phone has a distinct accent from perhaps Europe- it wasn’t certain. When we arrived at the Miami acupuncture office, I met Eva. I felt that it was a synchronicity that she shared the same name as my daughter, so I figured that was a God wink. But to tell you the truth, I would try anything at that point, even needles that scared me. Eva was a blond beauty who was from the Czech Republic. She spoke many languages, amongst which included Italian (another God wink as I speak Italian as well). She let me choose the treatment room,one was blue and the other was orange. I chose orange. She asked me questions as to what was going on in my life. I could barely hold my head up I felt so much shame and despair. I felt like a beaten woman and told her that I was quickly losing hope. She checked my tongue and my pulse- i still am not sure what it tells her. She explained to me in simple terms how Chinese medicine could help me reduce the tinnitus and decrease my anxiety. Then she treated me with acupuncture needles, while at the same time showing me a lot of compassion which was just as healing. That was the beginning of a healing relationship that still benefits me today. It took a long while for me to experience days without the ringing, but it has happened and I feel so much better nearly 1 1/2 later. I find a lot of peace with acupuncture. I still am not sure what the needles do, but I am a huge proponent of the practice. In a life filled with stress, it allows me an opportunity each week to unwind and allow my body to be unblocked. Eva was an important part of my healing journey. I highly recommend acupuncture as a healing tool. I also would recommend Eva. She is not only my doctor but has become a good friend. I am forever grateful to Karyn for introducing and taking me to Eva. With this introduction, it was the first time I felt that there was hope that I could be healed. Thank you to Eva for your beautiful healing abilities. You have a rare gift. We were meant to know each other!